whose dick do i have to suck to suck a dick around here
I was at the mall today and overheard this dude talking to two lesbian chicks. I hear him ask, “So which one of you is the guy in your relationship?” And the one girl looks into her pants and says, “It’s not me. How bout you? Are you hiding a dick in there?” Then her girlfriend looks in her pants and says, “Nope, I’m not.” Then the first chick looks at the dude and says, “Hmmm, guess that’s why we are lesbians.” And then I lost my shit.
Don’t fear death, fear the state in which you will die.
I was always afraid of Ohio
why is there a huge jug of oregano??? who the fuck puts oregano in brownies?????
i have been informed that it is not oregano but is in fact marijuana
Life lesson: If anyone is scared of you, lick them.
#okay but if legendaries are basically like gods this is like zeus coming down from mt. olympus and licking your face
if it was zeus he’d do a hell of a lot more than lick your face let’s be real
if i do not see josh peck interviewed by oprah before i die i will not have lived a full life